Paul Robinson is one of the men behind the cult social media channels 'The Carlton Draft' and 'The Ressies Footballer'.
His Black and White passion is unquestionable, and the views represented in this article are solely his own and not representative of the Collingwood Football Club.
What’s bigger? The boots Mason Cox pulls on when he runs onto the MCG, or the idea of us beating the Bombers?
There is no certain answer. Both are absolutely huge.
This week we are damned if we do, and damned if we don’t.
Why?
Well, if we lose, we’re pretenders for losing to the 12th-placed Bombers. If we win? We’re just pretenders who only beat the measly 12th placed Bombers!
Yep. This is what happens when the Pies come good. The knockers come out of the woodwork to try and marginalise our success. It’s the sweetest type of argument to have! They may as well say “yeah but you only won because you scored more than the opposition!”
The match ups this week are enough to get the blood rushing. I’m not enough of a wanker to wear the Fitbit my fiancé bought me for Christmas, but if I was, my heartrate would be well into hundreds looking at who will line up on who.
Brayden Maynard on Jake Stringer. Brodie Grundy on Tom Bellchambers. Tom Langdon on Anthony McDonald-Tipungwuti. Mason Cox on Michael Hurley. These are just some of the mouth-watering match ups we’ll get to on the way to claiming the ultimate win on the scoreboard.
Brodie Grundy absolutely beasting Tom Bellchambers on ANZAC Day. Image: AFL Photos.
After Sunday, we will have 11 wins under our belt. Imagine hearing that win-loss record after the loss to the Giants in round two?
We’re watching something special unfold before our very eyes, Magpie fans.
The kids are alright, in fact, they’re better than alright. One in particular who has impressed me since first sight is Jaidyn Stephenson.
This week, the great Cyril Rioli left vacant the throne to being the best small forward in the competition. And no one is more suited to it than our Fortnite loving, chocolate milkshake drinking boy from Upper Ferntree Gully.
I’ve delved into the bible this week (Champion Data’s Season Guide, for all those not religious) and looked up some stats comparing Cyril and Stepho,
Rioli’s first 14 games he’d had 195 disposals, taken 52 marks, laid 51 tackles and kicked 14 goals.
After Stephenson’s first 14 games he’s had 175 disposals (-20), taken 51 marks (-1), laid 45 tackles (-6) and kicked 24 goals (+10).
If my future predictions are correct, Stephenson will end his career with at least double the four premiership medallions owned by Cyril too.
I hear whispers Bucks has renamed the forward fifty “THE DANGERZONE”, in reference our speedy young gun. Watch this space and board the bus to the highway.
Enjoy the weekend, Pies fans.
Keep calm and hate Essendon.
Jaidyn Stephenson is dangerous and exciting. Image: AFL Photos.
