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SUSPENDING BELIEF
 
Or to put it another way.........
 
IT'S HEAD FIRST AT COLLINGWOOD
 
Gina Dodd is Ballarat's very own BJ Queen (and before you all go off half cocked we're talking Ballarat Jaffles here okay!) and her Collingwood constitution is as iron clad as her giant jaffle making machine.
She's also a self confessed Spudaholic - bless her black 'n' white heart.
 
When Gina isn't busy jamming meat into her juicy jaffles she's hard at work plotting the next Magpie premiership.
 
Now we get a lot of mail here at Spud Central from industrious Spudsters the world over but Gina's offering this week really caught our eye.
 
Buoyed by the dramatic turn around in club fortunes following the recent player suspensions Gina believes in order for the Pies not to lose any momentum going into the finals they should suspend at least one senior player each week thus insuring the Pies winning streak continues and that much coveted piece of silverware finds it way to the hallowed halls of Lexusland.
 
Normally, we dismiss crazy ideas quicker than Italian do polititians. For example the one suggesting the Federal Government change the national anthem to:
 
"Australians all let us rejoice,
The Pies are young and free,"
 
Any self respecting Spudster knows that if you are gunna change Addy Aussie Fair you should do it properly.
Y'know, something sensible like this:
 
"Australians all let us rejoice,
The God John An-tho-nyyyyyyy!"
 
But Gina's idea has genuine merit.
 
The trick, of course, is to not let onto the Collingwood starved media that it is all a tactical scam of Nigerian lottery proportions. So the Pies need to devise believable breaches of discipline in order to not make the sudden suspensions appear suspicious.
 
So this week they should leak a story suggesting that Collingwood's own eco warrior, Sensible Shane Wakelin, got busted burning off leaves in his back yard. To really whip the media into a frenzy they could quote a neighbour stating that she had just put freshly washed clothes on the line too.
That's gotta be worth one week at least!
Get Rambo Brown back and freshen Wakes up for the finals.

The following week Simon Prestigiacomo could be suspended for the rest of the season for vowel abuse.
 
And then Brodie Holland could be put on notice posthumously for Brownlow fashion faux pas'.
Heck! If we have to we can suspend Bucks just for putting up with Denis Cometti's inane Friday night dribble.
 
The beauty of all this is not only will it continue to inspire the troops to bigger and better things, it will also have zero impact on the side itself.
 
Now THAT is a plan!

Please note: the views expressed in the above article are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the Collingwood Football Club or employees of the club. The Collingwood Football Club would like to acknowledge the tireless work of its supporters who contribute to collingwoodfc.com.au