GRAPE EXPECTATIONS
There was a bunch of ‘em!
Or to put it another way……….
SUMMER WHINE
The more things change, the more they stay the same.
They say charity begins at home.
This is wrong.
It clearly begins on the Gold Coast!
Howdy Spudsters!
I’m back.
We’re back.
Footy’s back.
And sadly Channel Seven’s back.
Now I don’t want to turn this into a slagging session.
I’ve got all season to bag Channel Seven.
But, as the coroner said to Anna Nicole-Smith, you don’t have to be dead to be stiff.
THAT COVERAGE WAS AN ABOMINATION!!!!!!
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not upset about it.
Truth be told I’m still recovering from Britney Spears shaving her head to look like Nick Maxwell – I can’t tell ‘em apart! Not only do they look alike now they’re both mad. Neither appear to know how to use the pill properly. Although on last night’s form Maxi is definitely improving.
But two things struck me about Seven’s coverage.
- For the first game of the year it was flatter than a bus driver’s backside.
- They only mentioned Collingwood if they had to!
The Pies were about as welcome as Mel Gibson at the Oscars!The commentary team were suffering from incontinence the way they gushed over the Koastaroos ‘young stars’. Which is fair enough, but they only realised Pendles was on the ground midway through the last term when he began outstatting Johnno!
And speaking of the commentary team I nearly fell off me Jason recliner-rocker when up bobbed Ricky Olarenshaw! I’m used to see him clutching a hamstring not a microphone. Where does Seven get these ‘inspired’ ideas from!?
As loyal Woodsfolk we’ve all come to accept opposition mass hysteria at the drop of a black ‘n’ white hat should anything appear to favour the Pies but Satdee night’s coverage was just about as blatant a plug for the Koastaroos as was humanly possible.
How’s this gem from Cometti after the young Maggies staged a late revival and the sell out crowd started making some noise for the first time in the game:
”I’d have the crowd in the Kangaroos favour.” drawled Cometti.
Now I like a good joke as much as the next bloke and blokette but the Roos can’t pull 6,000 fans down here in their home state so what, for the love of Bucks, makes him think they could pull 6,000 well tanned ones up there!!
And given Collingwood’s dominance of television ratings you’d think Seven would have made a better effort.
Here are some stats they didn’t mention:
Games experience that played:
Collingwood: 1104 games
Kangaroos: 1858 games
Difference: 754 games
Total Games missing from best team
Collingwood: 1754 games
Kangaroos: 289 games
Difference: 1465 games
And here are some things they overlooked:
With Collingwood opting to play the kids and basically forfeiting the chance to win the million dollar Pre-season Cup/Premiership bonus they will only make an 8 million dollar operating profit this year.
Pendles looks very very good. In fact he is so good in traffic he could navigate his way through a Tulla Freeway bottleneck. Clearly the highlight of the night at Spud Central. I’m gunna make the first big call of 2007 – Pendles is Rattenesque!
Dicky in the midfield rotation!
Whilst I don’t expect to see him there in Round 1 it is still a huge pat on his back.
Heathy and Johnno picking up where they left off in 2006. Happy with that.
And happy to hear Petrie complimenting Travis Cloke on his workrate also.
The bonus is the Koastaroos have shown their hand. There will be no surprises in Round 1 or charity.
So as all black ‘n’ white eyes turn to Friday’s (4:30PM) Princes Park praccy match with the Aints what were my fellow Spudsters’ highlights from our Pre-season Cup encounter?
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